Other Half of Me

Tonight is the first of three nights that James is away in New Zealand for a staff conference. And boy, am I feeling lonely.

So I started to think about what I have planned for the next few days to pass the time. For tonight, I rented a movie. Tomorrow, I'll take my time at the gym in the morning and then I'm meeting a friend for lunch. In the evening I have band practise. On Friday I'm making a trial meal at Meal Magic. I might also treat myself and try out one of those massages in those Asian-run stores you can find in most shopping centres. In the evening I have a social to attend. I have no idea at this point what to do with my Saturday, but worst case scenario I can always play with fizzykal, my Neopet or update my MySpace page. In the evening I'm going to a "girls' night in" fundraiser event for breat cancer research.

As I thought about these next few days, I started to wonder, why am I spending most of this time alone? Do I have no friends? Has becoming married caused me to fail in the area of building extra-marital friendships? I typically spend my Fridays and Saturdays with James. Now that he's not here I have no one to spend it with. Well, I did try to schedule time with another friend on Friday afternoon but she had to cancel for completely understandable reasons.

Then revelation hit me. The kind of loneliness I am feeling tonight goes far beyond what I felt in my high school days. Back then, if my best friend went away on holiday for a week or more, I would miss having my favourite activity partner to hang out with.

But James is not just my best friend, he's so much more. He's my other half. When he's not around I feel like a part of me is missing. This statement may sound rather cliche but I must concede that it completely describes how I feel tonight, despite my personal dislike of all things cliche.

If you are not yet married and you've been angry at a friend because you felt he/she abandoned you because once he/she got married you two weren't as close anymore, there's something you need to understand. If your best friend were asked by his/her company to relocate to another country, you probably wouldn't quit your job and rearrange your life to move with him/her. You don't share all your money in a single bank account. You don't need to consider his/her schedule when planning other things. You might be the best of friends, but you don't share a life. Once you get married, you and your spouse will no longer lead separate lives. You will lead only one life, together.

I've had my share of very close girl and guy friends. But not one single one of them comes close to my friendship with James. No one else knows me like he does, no one else understands me like he does. No one else knows the REAL me, because no one spends even half as much time with me. And if I were asked to consider moving to another continent, I wouldn't just up and go and leave James behind. No! We would discuss our options and make a decision TOGETHER and carry it out TOGETHER.

So tonight, half of me is missing, and that half is somewhere across the ocean in a far away land. When I was single I never thought I would say this because I never knew about it's truth. No amount of activity or Neopets or MySpace will fill this empty space, it will only temporarily distract from the feeling of emptiness which will inevitably return when it's time to go to bed alone.

If you are not yet married, I hope one day you will experience what I am experiencing. Not because I want you to feel hopelessly lonely, but because the only reason you could possibly feel this lonely is because you have as wonderful a relationship with your spouse as I do!

James, I can't wait for you to come home!

Treetop Unlikely

I love Google! But I hate.... HATE SPAM!

Where did they get my email address from in the first place? Especially my work email address! I've been getting heaps of spam at my work email address (more spam than actual emails) and it doesn't even make sense because I don't use it for anything except... well, work.

And the email headings don't even make sense, headings such as "soapy someone", "intake unfamiliar", "treetop unlikely" and "softball discontinuation". It's like they came up with their email titles by taking two random words from the dictionary and combining them together. And to top it off, every email is from a different email address.

I know it's from the same people despite the different email addresses, because the email has the same look every time.

Does anyone know how I can trace the source of these emails so I can spam them back? Okay I don't really want to spam them back, that would be quite immature. But then again, maybe I don't want to be mature!

This is why - please, please, PLEASE if you find it necessary to send a mass email learn to use the 'bcc' section! I love you and I love your emails, but I hate spam!

Internet Explorer security flaw

I read an article today in The Age entitled "Flaw found in new Microsoft browser". I strongly suggest that if you use Microsoft's Internet Explorer to do your online banking, read this article just so you're aware of it.

This and other security issues I have heard about are what led to my decision to switch to Mozilla's Firefox browser.

Cyberspace Essentials (part I)

Whilst I do agree with James about his recent point about online friendships largely being superficial, at the same time I absolutely love reading up on all my (real life) friends' blogs and websites because it puts me in touch with their worlds.

For example, a good friend from my Hong Kong days recently started boxing competitively. Through her blog, I have been able to share some of her boxing experiences and even see photographic footage of some of her battle wounds.

If you are serious about staying in touch with your friends, please heed this advice from a person (i.e. me!) who has multiple blogs, multiple networking accounts and photos and videos uploaded all over the internet. Having spent much time trying out different sites (a hobby of mine, I take internet surfing to a new level!), I can pass on some of my knowledge and recommendations to you and save you some time, then I'll sleep tonight a happier girl.

N.B. For brevity's sake, I will post more parts on this topic another time. This will already be quite a long post and I generally am not a fan of long posts - blogs are meant to be read so if a blogger writes too much in every post then their readers tend to get into the habit of thinking "I'll read this blog later when I have more time". In this case I'll make an exception because I believe you will want to read this post for the practical advice it offers you.

MUST-HAVE tools for SERIOUS cyberspace sharing and surfing:

1. Feed Reader
If you regularly check multiple sites and blogs, this tool will save you time because you only need to go to one place to check up on which of your favourite sites have been updated, rather than having to continually check in on your friends' sites only to find no updates most of the time (and thus wasting your time waiting for that un-updated site to download). I use Google Reader; because I already have a Google account, I didn't have to create a new user account to use the reader. Ask away if you have any questions about my experiences and why I recommend feed readers so highly!

2. Online Photo Album
"A picture is worth a thousand words" or so the saying goes. I use Picasa Web for two reasons -
a) it is easy to upload photos to it directly from Picasa
b) the photos are stored in their original file size so friends who want to download the photos for themselves will get the original quality file.

Multiply, which is an online networking site like MySpace, Bebo, etc also features a good online album. Multiply has no limit to the number of photos that can be uploaded whereas Picasa Web has a 250MB limit (which is still a lot of space, and you can get more if you are willing to pay). However photos downloaded from a Multiply album will not be of original size, they must reduce them upon upload.

Blog here, blog there, blog everywhere.

I just signed up at another online blog/profile site. I did this in order to leave a comment on a friend's blog that I found particularly interesting (Kudos to you Devi). My observation is that it is amazing how many of these sites now exist and the 'communities' that have developed around them. It is so easy to sign up and join a new network and connect to new 'friends'. I may be the only one who feels this way but it all seems just a little artificial. It’s not a real connection with a person; it’s a word transaction with whatever digitized picture that person has chosen to represent himself or herself with. I say this because there is no genuine emotion expressed through these sites, simply the exchange of news and superficial information. When is the last time you really helped someone through the myspace medium?

Personally, I just don't have time to keep up with all my online ‘friends’ lives. In his book the Tipping Point, author Malcolm Gladwell writes that you can only have a meaningful relationship with a community of about 150 people. Anymore than that, and sociologically we just can't keep up. As much as I love getting messages from people and reading what they write to me, if I don’t already have an established regular relationship with these people outside of myspace then it is too hard.

When I do have a relationship with the person that I am writing to then I think its great that we have this extra fun element to the way we communicate. Ultimately though I have a fear that myspace and the like is simply another distraction that keeps us from doing the things that we really need to. It is amazing how in the 20th century, the western world has consistently managed to find something trivial to fill its time with.

Oh well, I just saw a link about Madonna adopting an African child. I wonder what that is all about? I think I’ll check it out…

Backyard Bliss

Ahh, this is the life!

Did anyone else out there enjoy today's sunshine and 23 degree weather?

James and I certainly did! We sat in our backyard facing the setting sun as we worked (or in my case played) on our computers.

For those of you who are trying this - a cap is not just a fashion statement or sun protection, it is essential! It blocks the sunlight so that you can actually see your computer screen.

The sun is setting behind the neighbour's house right now, so it's probably about time for me to get back inside before I get cold. At least I can take my cap and sunnies off now!

P.S. the more observant of you will notice that James is not completely missing from this photo - his shadow is ever present as he clicks the shutter on the camera.

Sealers Cove updated

Hi guys, if you read the Sealers Cove post prior to this being posted, check it out again! I've added extra photos and also a couple of treats - two videos. Enjoy, let me know what you think. We certainly had fun making the vids. :)

Camping at Sealers Cove

The beautiful Sealers Cove, only accessible by foot or by boat.

Clever Claude and Lovely Lidiya organised a couples' camping trip at Sealers Cove, Wilson's Prom. I would highly recommend to anyone who has never been camping before - you gotta try it at least once! This weekend brought back some delicious memories of family camping trips during my childhood and also my high school days...

I could write all about about this wonderful experience, but pictures are worth thousands of words. Numbers can also tell a lot. So with that in mind,

Statistics and photos from our trip:
# photos taken by James and me: 173
# videos taken by James and me: 14
# people in our car: 4 -- thanks for the wonderful company, Kool K's!

total distance walked: 20km -- 1okm each way
estimated walking time: 3 hrs one way
actual walking time: 2.5 hrs one way -- yeah, we beat the sign by a 1/2 hour!



# competitive people who wanted to get to the campsite first: at least 4
-- go Snares & Staggers!

# tents pitched: 8



# snakes seen: 1
# snakes seen by me: 0



# bugs caught in my clothing: 1
# bugs that freaked me out and made me scream: 1
# crazy guys who went swimming in the freezing cold sea: 3
# crabs on the beach: too many to count

drink of the day: coffee & milk in a tube



charades player of the day: definitely Claude



# people who went climbing on the rocks: 7



# cuts on my feet: 2
# splinters in my feet: 1

# songs written at the campsite: 1
# songs written at the campsite that Claude absolutely loves: 1

# campers: 16

# campers who got a piggy back rides across a stream: at least 5



# campers who will be sore tomorrow: at least 14
# campers who are sore right now: I don't know, but James & I definitely are
# campers who will never forget this wonderful experience: 16
# campers who are running a marathon tomorrow: 1 -- I'm not kidding, promise!

P.S. if you want to see more photos click here.

Stream of Consciousness

I am currently sitting in class and due to the tedious nature of the material and the fact that I have just had a rather large lunch, the only thing that I can do to stay awake is write my very late blog entry.

Seeing as this is an entirely spontaneous decision I have no specific topic in mind and am therefore going to participate in an experiment of following my stream of consciousness to see what direction it takes us on.

After sitting for several seconds the only thought that came into my mind was that I had been sitting here for several seconds without having a thought except that I hadn’t had a thought yet.

Now my mind is wondering to the completely inane series of words that I am currently stringing together and whether anyone is actually going to be bothered reading through them all to discover something that might make them chuckle or at least peak their interest enough to hopefully come back and read another entry.

Now I’m wondering if I worry too much about whether anyone reads what I write and that perhaps that is not the point of a blog. Maybe the point of a blog is to serve as a journal to the public world. Another lonely voice crying out for attention in this cruel, cruel world.

Now I’m thinking that I really shouldn’t try to get too abstract when writing a blog entry as they quickly begin to sound like a 15 year olds attempt to understand the world, which though interesting to them, seems rather unoriginal to the rest of us.

Now I’m thinking about my own attempts to write or philosophize when I’m in high school and wondering if my realization that those attempts were incredibly bad has stopped me from seriously attempting to do any writing since then. Maybe I really should try to put some of my ideas for a book down on paper (or in some other digitized format that can be read as words) and give it a go.

Well I have found this particular experiment to be incredibly helpful. I must try it again some time. I hope that you will journey again with me.

What do you mean, shopping isn't a sport?

Last week, during my shopping activities, I suffered a wound to my forehead:


I was wounded whilst trying on a top ~ the price tag got caught between the top and my head and as a result, the corner of the price tag scratched me as I continued to pull the top over my head. Ouch! Funny how the shallow wounds sometimes hurt the most.

This leads me to the conclusion that if it is possible to be wounded during shopping, then perhaps it could be classified as a sport after all.

I ended up purchasing that top, by the way.